The quote “absence makes the heart grow fonder” is very true of relationships.
And sometimes it is even true of broken relationships. We tend to forget about the things that helped cause the end of the relationship and concentrate on the things that made us fall in love. So, the best question to ask before getting back together with your ex is: What’s changed? What has changed in the other person that makes you feel that they will not do the behaviors they did before? And, what has changed in you that will help convince the other person that they will not go back into the same broken relationship as before? What can you do, for your part, to have a better 2.0 relationship? What expectations do you have for the other person?
One difficult thing to do would be to sit down and honestly list all the reasons why the relationship ended. Then, ask yourself if you can live with those things now, even if nothing were to change. Remember, you cannot do anything to change another person, you can only change yourself.
Workplace politics are inevitable.
No matter what you try, there will be a point when they come knocking at your door. There is one sure-fire way to get around these politics: Stick to your values. Do not do anything that feels uncomfortable to you. If you find yourself in a situation where it feels like your face is on fire because you have been put into an uncomfortable situation, go to your boss and ask for help. However, if it is your boss that is causing it, can you go to their boss? If not, this may not be the right place for you to work. It may be time to brush up your resume and look for a place that has core values similar to yours.
And remember to go to www.webishops.com, under Success Planning, to watch a video on finding your core values if you need help.
What I love most about being an entrepreneur
is that I can follow my heart. I spent the better part of two decades working for major corporations in the IT industry. During that time, there were many things I had to do because I would lose my job if I did not do it, but they went against my personal core values. These were not illegal, just actions meant to line corporate profits before benefitting the customer. Now, as an entrepreneur, I can set my businesses up from the start with the same core values I have rather than following the core values of someone else.
Hey girls, want to make your guy fall in love with you all over again? Here are some compliments that will help!
*Help me: This sounds weird, but men are natural fixers. They want to help, so don’t be afraid to ask for it. And when you ask for help you are telling him you trust him to fix whatever is wrong.
*You were great last night: Even the most confident man wonders how he is in bed. If you are with a man that does well in that area, compliment him on it. The more you compliment him, the more enthusiastic he will be.
*Such a big… brain: All men know a lot about something, even if it is sports. You may not like sports, but it certainly won’t hurt to compliment him on his knowledge. It will make him feel better, and his buddies will be jealous that he has such a cool partner.
*Eye candy: Compliment your guy on his clothes, even if you help him pick them out. Let him know you think he looks great (as long as he does). He will love you more for it, and appreciate your help (even if he tries to act manly and brush it off).
We all want to believe that our partner has our best intentions, but that is not always the case. Watch for these warning signs that a relationship may be toxic:
* No give and take: It’s common to want to give of yourself to the person you love, but be mindful of whether the other person is doing the same thing. If you are giving all the time, and they are taking all the time, you will soon start to resent your partner.
*The talker: We all love to hear the voice of our partner, and we want to know everything about them, but do they want to know all about you also? Does the conversation go both ways, or do they spend all their time talking about themselves? If your love talks non-stop, it could mean they have past issues that have destroyed their self-confidence.
*The rebound: Is your love with you, but has yet to break up with their last relationship? Run. If that person is dating you and another person at the same time, they have no respect for you or them. And, chances are, they will do the same to you when they get tired of you.
*Text heck: Time with your loved one is precious, but does he/she let you go (to work, see friends, etc.) without texting you 15 times an hour? This is another indicator of a lack in self-confidence by that person. Many people do this because they are afraid you will cheat on them. Unfortunately, that same person is likely to cheat on you.
The word “goals” almost makes your chest tighten and stress levels rise.
The knowledge of so many past goals that have failed may even lower your self-confidence.
So stop making goals.
Create a vision for your future instead. What do you want to be able to say/do/feel about yourself that you cannot say/do/feel now? Get as specific as you can. Don’t just say “I want to lose weight,” nobody likes to lose anyway. Turn it to a positive, like “I want to be able to fit into size ** jeans,” or “I want to eat 2 healthy meals a day and work out 3 days a week.” Don’t make your vision out of reach.
After you have your vision down, create action steps. What is one small thing you can change now to get one step closer to your vision? Is it changing one junk food snack into something healthier? Is it planning a 10 minute workout once a week? Start small. All the past failures may have eroded your confidence. Small successes will help to build it back up.
And if it doesn’t work, don’t consider it a failure. Figure out what went wrong, what you can do to overcome that, and try again. As long as you keep trying, you are not failing.
Networking is a great way to get your business known in the local community, but there are some things to avoid as well.
Do: Dress for success. Even if you are a contractor, don’t go to a networking event with pitch on your hand and dirty, wrinkled clothes. Dress professionally. You don’t have to wear a 3-piece suit or formal dress, but wear clean, pressed clothes.
Don’t: Say you are nervous. Everyone already knows you are nervous if you are new, no need to say it. And, chances are, if you don’t say it nobody will notice that you are.
Do: Have your elevator pitch ready. The elevator pitch is a 30-60 second pitch on what you do. Not who you are. Nobody cares who you are until they know what you do. Find out more about elevator pitches here.
Don’t: Be a wall flower. This is tough for introverts. But, shake hands and do that small talk you dislike. Practice small talk before you get there and think of 4-5 things you can talk about. One hint: Look at the clothing of the other person. If you find something unusual, like earrings or silly socks, mention it. They will probably be happy to talk about it.
Do: Bring a lot of business cards. If 20 people are expected at the event, bring 40 business cards. And bring professional business cards. Keep cards in your vehicle also in case you forget to bring some.
Introverts: Find more networking and leadership tips in the book Leadership for Introverts.
The word leader has been getting some mixed definitions lately.
A leader is simply a person who has influence over other people. A leader is not necessarily a manager. A manager is a person who is hired to manage employees. Anyone can be a leader, but it is not easy to be a good leader. A good leader will listen to the advice of the other people in the group and act on that advice. Of course, you cannot please everyone all the time, but a good leader will always do what is best for the group in general. And the only way to find out the needs of the group is to listen.
Learn more Introvert Leader skills by reading Leadership for Introverts.
The book Timeless SEO Secrets that Search Engines Don’t Want You To Know About is now available at Amazon.com and Smashwords.
Dr. Ty Belknap has been working with computers since 1982. He was a networking engineer for companies such as Compaq, Hewlett Packard, and Microsoft.
He first started optimizing web sites in 1995 (before it was called SEO). In 2002, he broke away from Corporate America and started his first web design and internet marketing company. Since then, he has successfully put over 3,000 keywords onto page one of the search engines for almost 200 different industries.
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Being an entrepreneur myself, and having run a web development business for almost two decades, I have seen many ecommerce businesses come and go. And, with the statistics from the Small Business Administration that say up to 85% of all businesses have been failing within 18 months of starting, the odds are against entrepreneurs.
But there are steps entrepreneurs can take to better those odds.
Start by working on your business. There are five basic questions you can answer that could make a huge difference in the success of your endeavors. They are: Why are you doing what you are doing, what are your core values, what is your mission, what is your strategic vision, and what is your strategy? Working on your business, especially when starting out, is just as important as working in your business. That is why I have created a series of free webinar/workshops (I call them Webishops) to help entrepreneurs at www.webishops.com. These Success Planning Webishops help you to answer each of those five questions.
Introvert entrepreneurs, read my book Leadership for Introverts.